(Pic Courtesy : via Google.com)
Life, with Macadamia and Pecan, has never been anything short of crazy. I mean the - "driving the parents crazy" kind. Of late, however, the ante has definitely been upped. They are at each others' throats constantly, all the time. It's not as if they need a good reason to argue or get into a tiff. They just do !! Simply because - well, they just do !! They've agreed to disagree on just about anything and everything. What I've penned below is what one witnesses in the Krishnans' household just about any morning or should I say, every morning !!!
Aieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee, screamed one
In the early hours of the morning, it seemed so brazen
Ooiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii screamed the other
Loud enough to wake even the neighbour
Now you know why our entire apartment block
Has absolutely no need for an alarm clock
We do take environmental issues seriously
And early in the morning, produce a very loud vocal medley.
Now if you’re wondering what this is all about
“tis nothing else but Macadamia and Pecan, showing their clout
‘Cos you see, they love to bicker and fallout
“Tis nothing but sibling love – total and devout
They scream, they yell and they screech
While “God, please save me”, I beseech
What a way to start the day
These noisy mornings, I so have to essay
Macadamia and Pecan loll around in bed
Sounds peaceful ?, Oh ! please don’t be misled
The peace suddenly registers in both their brains
And for a fight, their energies they regain
For, the Nutty Sibs believe in the theory that
The day is absolutely not meant to be begun in peace
At the break of dawn, peace should totally cease
They rush towards the bathroom in a frenzy
Yelling at each other like a couple of banshees
“I got here first” says Macadamia with a glare
Oh ! That look ! She’s looking for open warfare
“I went in first” says Pecan, with daggers in his eyes
Macadamia stares and from her eyes, the sparks fly
Through all this, I maintain a rather safe distance
Hoping to God they wouldn’t notice my absence
“Mummmeeeeeeeeeee” yells Macadamia, her voice dripping ire
“Oh No” “Oh No” I say in dismay, not wanting to get into the mire
“Mummmmeeeeeeeee” comes the yell and this time it’s Pecan
“She barking at me like a dog” he says, all woebegone
“I’m SO NOT” yells Macadamia, with looks that could kill
A rather nonplussed spectator to all this is Timmy the Turtle
Pecan demands “Why do you need the footstool ?”
Macadamia responds “simply because it is cool”
Says Pecan “I need that footstool to reach the washbasin while you don’t”
Macadamia says “I know that but get off the footstool, I SO won’t”
A tussle ensues and of course there’s pushing
I step in to break up the brawl and the nutty sibs are left seething
“No getting physical with each other” is one strict rule
It does not matter if the nutty sibs think that rule is so uncool !
A fight brewing inside them, they look around in haste
Their eyes’ look around, searching for the toothpaste
Yes ! That’s where the next fight is based
“I got it first” yells Pecan, all defiant
Eyes narrowed, nostrils flared, Macadamia is all set to hunt
“Breathe Breathe” I tell myself, assuring that things can’t get any worse
“Why do they do this ?” a part of me asks, “for, it all seems so perverse”
I do remember to Thank the Good Lord
For Macadamia and Pecan cannot afford
To scream and yell at each other in distaste
With their mouths full of toothpaste !!!!
In the meanwhile, Mommy’s escaped
seriously thinking that their mouths ought to be taped !!!!!!!!!!
While Mommy gets their cups of milk ready
The Nutty Sibs are found staring at each other cagily.
Pecan says “I’m taking this chair”
Macadamia retorts “Hey ! That’s SO not fair”
Phew ! Just as one argument ended, another one begins
Exactly what have we here ? A couple of loony bins ??!!
Yells Macadamia “Don’t you kick me under the table”
Says Pecan “I did NOT ! his tone decidedly nasal.
“Stop talking and drink your milk” says Macadamia, all sassy
“You are NOT my boss” retorts Pecan, “so stop being bossy” !
Peace temporarily reigns, as their milk they glug
While Mommy seriously considers getting a pair of earplugs
Mommy’s just beginning to think that they’re done for the morning
When, there comes a loud loud scream, without any warning
Dropping vessels in a haste, to the bedroom we rush
Only to find Macadamia, hands on her hips, face all flushed
Eyes glare, rage spews and Macadamia hisses
“Why are you always like this ? asks Pecan, as Mommy visibly flinches
“You keep out of this” roars Macadamia, her ire evident
And Pecan, having found a way to irritate her, is anything but prudent
“You always bark like this” says Pecan, enjoying his moment
While Macadamia stares at us, dangerously silent
“Why did you scream” I ask, having almost forgotten
Macadamia complains, “Cos this thing is a demon”
She is referring to her dear shower cap
Which around her hair, is indeed wrapped
Protests Macadamia “It does not stay on my hair, it keeps coming off”
“Simple solution” grins Pecan and says “Time for your hair to be cut off”
The house quite literally turns into a setting for a Tom and Jerry toon
While the “by now crazy” Mommy is all ready to go dizzy and swoon
Macadamia somehow gets bundled into the bath
Else, there sure would have ensued a bloodbath
No one in their right minds should be in their paths
Else, in the morn, they’d incur the Nutty Siblings’ wrath
“Leave some water for me” yells Pecan, goading yet again
Patience, God, Patience by the container load I SO do need, Amen !
“Stoooppppppppppp Ittttttttt” screams Macadamia from the bathroom
“I did not do anything” says Pecan, and the arguments resume
The next half hour passes in a blur
And Mommy desperately longs for a breather
Finally they’re dressed in their uniforms
When Pecan has yet another of his brainstorms
“Have you taken your homeopathy pills yet ?” he asks
And in the glory of his question, he totally basks
For Pecan knows that Macadamia did forget
And yet again, we witness yet another onset
The glares, the stares and the tirade
As anger rises yet again and nerves are frayed.
This is part of a normal day, every morning
With the Nutty Sibs around, things happen without any warning.
Standing near the mirror, a safe distance from the fray
Mommy suddenly noticed that some more of her hairs had turned grey !!!
“How did that happen ?” you ask ??
Handling the Nutty Siblings, ‘tis quite a task !!!