07 September, 2006

This is the way we go to school, go to school, go to school .......

Yesterday was Abhay’s fourth day of school and I had thought things were on their way towards getting better - albeit still slightly askew. In the morning, when I took his uniform out of the hanger, he looked at it and started to cry. No wails or howls, but silent tears which refused to stop sliding down those little cheeks.

When we started out of the house bound schoolwards, in the elevator, he looked at me with a very plaintive look in his eyes and says "Let's go to park ?". Broke my heart, it did !! I told him gently but firmly that 9 am to 12 noon is school time and that we would take him to the park in the evening.

Once on our way to school there seemed to be a transformation of sorts. While walking down the stairs, there were three children ahead and behind us and all three of them were howling at the prospect of a three hour school agenda. He stayed quiet all along. When we reached the bottom of the stairs he seemed to actually be in a hurry to get into school.

Once into school too, he walked briskly towards his classroom and went in by himself. Met his teacher who came forward with a big “Good Morning Abhay”. No reply. I gently prompted him to say “Good Morning” but got only “the look” in response. After putting his backpack into his cubby, his teacher led him towards the toy shelf. Toys did not elicit any response either. Finally, he shook his head in the negative. She then asked him if he would like to read a book. There was an immediate shake of the head in the affirmative. They went off towards the book shelf and she gave him a board book with a teddy bear plonked on it. When I left, he was busy sitting on his chair and leafing through the teddybear book.

Today, again, the sight of the uniform had him in tears. But the moment we stepped out of the house, the tears stopped and he seemed more in a rush to reach the school. Once there, he was pulling insistently on my hand to get into the school and once in, he walked into the class by himself. I handed him his backpack which he put into his cubby by himself. And was rewarded by a big “Good Boy” from one of his teachers.

She then prompted him towards the toy shelf and he kind of stood in front of the shelf for a couple of minutes and then picked up a block puzzle to play with. No two guesses as to what blocks they were !! There was a car, a scooter, a airplane – everything to do with wheels !! Seemed much more focused today. His teacher asked him to sit down on one of the chairs – till yesterday he had to be led to one of the chairs but today there was none of that. He walked over and on the way to the chair one of the puzzle pieces fell on the floor. His teacher rushed forward to help but he would have none of it. Very patiently he set the whole board on the floor, picked up the errant block, put it on the board and turned and twirled it till it fit into the board, then picked up the whole board and set it on the table and then plonked on the chair. When I left school today, he was busy with the puzzle.

Once I drop him off at school, while on my way back home, I make real big plans about tackling some work that I had put off earlier cos it could not be done with Abhay running all over the place – what with his curiosity for new objects and things.

Yesterday and today as well, I had made big plans and plans they remained !! Nothing really moves once I get home. I really don’t know if it is due to the fact that he is still unsettled at school or whether it is due to the fact that I now find the house silent as a tomb in the mornings. No Appu around, no Abhay around ...

There is no pitter patter, plonk plonk of feet running, no BRRRRRRRRRR of cars racing by, no “A – Alligator number one squizes (squeezes) her Accordion” or “B-Bears on Bassoons Boo Boo Boo” or better still “F – Mingus (Flamingos) go a tweet tweet tweet upon a flute so chweet”.

There are none of those occasional screams that used to set my nerves on the edge and none of those yells that used to send my blood pressure shooting upwards. There are no imaginary doggies around the house or behind the doors to go “Bow Wow” with a cheeky smile.

The little squeaky voice is missing – the voice that counted and recited numbers over and over and over again so much so that I began to wonder as to why numbers were ever invented. There is no clatter, clank and jangling sounds resulting from the entire LEGO bucket being overturned at once.

There are no little arms, which, sometimes, out of the blue, wrap themselves around my feet or neck. There is no little person around who keeps pestering me by repeatedly saying “Please Tickli” (Abhayism for Tickle).

Like Erma Bombeck once said - “The silence is absolutely deafening”.

5 voice(s) said so:

B o o said...

Probably another year to go, but Im already worried!! Very touching post! I dont understand which will pain me more: if Ashu cries or if she does nt!! :(

mommyof2 said...


Try to say nice nice stuff:-))) at least until the 18th-19th:-)

btw nice to know that Abhay is almost adjusted to school..

Tharini said...

Dear Gauri,

I can sort of understand this silence, because when I first stayed home, without going to work, and Akhil was in school, I felt a little wierd.

But pratice makes better.

Its nice and also necessary to listen to the silnce and miss it and spend some time in thought of it. And once that's done, its time to get going again.

Life is a busy place and there's much to get done....and I am not just talking about to-do lists.

So make the minutes and hours count.

I liked what Erma Bombeck said. Silence IS defeaning.

Gauri said...

Hi girls

Boo : Time for me to say Welcome :-)
Yeah - its tough, but then what isn't ? And don't worry your head about it now - cross the bridge when you come to it. As of now, enjoy Ashu and her babyhood days :-)

G - Even if I say I'll try to say just the nice stuff - I'd be fibbing. And I'm not trying to discourage you or anything of that sort but the initial phase is unsettling for both - the child and the parent. But then again, that's life and it's never roses roses all the way, is it ??

Tharini - Thanks Dear for the touching yet encouraging comment. I'll get around to "get going" :-) I guess, right now, I'm still trying to get on even terms with the "silence" bit.

the mad momma said...

Gauri...how can you do this to Boo and me? Even I am dreading the silence ... I hope you're happy that I am crying now!!!

On a lighter note, congratulations on finally watching the little birdies fly away.